Matt Wiggins

Driving since: 2012
Points: 3
Crashes: 7

Matt was enrolled early in an experimental super-human program meant to train participants to the limits of human endurance. He emerged as the prime physical specimen you see today: able to do barely one unassisted chin up, and a top 50% finisher in his age group at the annual Sun Run.

It’s Desert Bus’ 10th year:

His first memory of Desert Bus:
Paul and James talking about doing a charity fund raiser for Child’s Play, like, a year before we actually did one.

Favourite DB gif:

Tally Heilke

Driving since: 2012
Points: 2
Crashes: 5

She was a mild-mannered, all-Canadian girl… until the day she saw her family crushed in front of her by a crate of glitter tumbling from a speeding Michael’s truck. Through rainbow coloured tears she vowed to teach people to craft WITHOUT glitter, so such tragedy would never occur again.

It’s Desert Bus’ 10th year:

Her first memory of Desert Bus:
Me, to Jeremy, “Sorry, I don’t quite follow. You’re going to do /what/ exactly all weekend with your friends? Desert what? That game sounds terrible.”

Favourite DB gif:

Cameron Lauder

Driving since: 2013

Points: 2

Crashes: 0

When not at Desert Bus, he can be found:
Cameron is a machine for turning coffee into swiftly deleted tweets. Now that he is taking time off from school, he has much more time to drink coffee and mask deep insecurity with unpleasantness.

Special Skills:
Cameron has a skill set that is as highly evolved and non-transferable as an orchid-pollinating wasp. He cannot sing or dance, but if you can develop a challenge that matches his combination of english lit and theoretical chemistry-based knowledge, have you considered a lucrative career as his employer?

He’s a total geek for:
Cameron has recently nerded out super hard over Battlestar Galactica, Twin Peaks, Avatar, and Korra.

Claim to Fame:
I have managed to convince several people that I am a person instead of an enormous terrified rat king wearing a trench coat and shoes.

Biggest fear about driving for DB8:
The possibility that love is not enough.

If he was reincarnated as a fruit or vegetable he would want to be:
A forgotten banana in the back of the freezer

Favourite Cheese:
Saganaki

Doesn’t want you to know he listens to:
VNV Nation

His “moves like Jagger” are more like:
Denethor falling of the Tower of Ecthelion while on fire

To prepare for driving the bus he is:
Pretending that Desert Bus is not happening. This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening.

What symbol does your superhero cape have on it?
A pale blue dot

Matt Wiggins

Driving since: 2012

Points: 1

Crashes: 6

When not at Desert Bus, he can be found:
Running, in the gym, drinking a beer, playing a video game, or producing a videogame (not necessarily in that order)

Special Skills:
I am generally pretty accomplished at presenting an outward appearance of surliness.

He’s a total geek for:
Comic books (of the modern, super-hero variety, especially Marvel)

Claim to Fame:
I can fold my tongue into a ‘w’

….lllllladies.

Biggest fear about driving for DB8:
That upon waking the day after the event is over, I will find that it is Friday Nov 14 again, and I am stuck in some sort of unending, inescapable Groundhog Day-esque time loop.

If he was reincarnated as a fruit or vegetable he would want to be:
Raspberry

Favourite Cheese:
Cheddar. Old.

Doesn’t want you to know he listens to:
Lady Gaga – Telephone (feat. Beyonce)

His “moves like Jagger” are more like:

To prepare for driving the bus he is:
Crying gently into a pillow, while curled in the corner of my room

What symbol does your superhero cape have on it?
NO CAPES.