Earlier in Liz & Tara’s shift, we challenged the community to come up with their best Desert Bus inspired recipes. Our winning submission, from Azralorne, included recipes for all four shifts!

Congratulations! We’ve included the full recipes from Azralorne, plus a couple of runner-up submissions after the jump.

Dawn Guard Crabby Eggs Benedict

English Muffin, toasted with butter.

Poached Egg:
2 eggs
Water
White vinegar
Kosher salt

Heat the water: Add enough water to come 1 inch up the side of a narrow, deep 2-quart saucier. Add 1 teaspoon kosher salt and 2 teaspoons white vinegar and bring to a simmer over medium heat. Meanwhile, crack 1 very fresh cold large egg into a custard cup or small ramekin. Use the handle of a spatula or spoon to quickly stir the water in one direction until it’s all smoothly spinning around.
Add the egg: Carefully drop the egg into the center of the whirlpool. The swirling water will help prevent the white from “feathering,” or spreading out in the pan.
Let it poach: Turn off the heat, cover the pan and set your timer for 5 minutes. Don’t peek, poke, stir or accost the egg in any way.
Lift it out: Remove the egg with a slotted spoon and serve immediately. Alternatively, move the egg to an ice bath and refrigerate up to 8 hours. Reheat in warm water just before serving.

Saffron Aioli:
1-2 minced garlic cloves
1-2 egg yolks
2 teaspoons lemon juice or white wine vinegar
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons hot water
Large pinch of saffron threads
3/4 cup olive oil

Crumble the saffron threads into the hot water in a small bowl. Let them steep 10 minutes.
In the bowl of a blender, briefly buzz the garlic, lemon juice, salt and egg yolks to combine. Add the saffron and the water and buzz until smooth. With the motor running, drizzle in the olive oil until the whole thing emulsifies into a mayonnaise-like consistency. Taste for salt and acid, adding a little lemon juice and salt if needed.

Sweet Corn Crab Cakes:
1lb. Crab meat claw or lumps
1 fresh ear of sweet corn
3/4 cup of panko bread crumbs plus 1 cup for breading
3. Tablespoons Mayonnaise
2 eggs
1/2 teaspoon Dijon Mustard
1/4 teaspoon fresh orange zest
1/4 teaspoon sweet Spanish paprika
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon celery salt
1/4 teaspoon white pepper
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1/4-1/2 cup grape seed oil for frying

Shred crab meat in a bowl. Beat eggs and add to crab, along with all the seasoning and ¾ cup breadcrumbs. Mix together until everything is thoroughly incorporated. Form patties and coat in the leftover 1 cup of breadcrumbs in a bowl. Fry in oil until golden brown and delicious.

Alpha Flight Spicy ChickCAWen

Harissa Crusted Airline Chicken Breast:

2 chicken breasts, airline cut (skin on, bone in)
2 cloves garlic, lightly chopped
2 tbs tomato paste
½ cup chicken broth
¼ cup Harissa paste
2 cans chickpeas, rinsed
1 pint cherry tomatoes

Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Heat oil in a cast iron skillet. Salt and pepper chicken breast skin and sear skin side down until crispy. Flip chicken over, and once browned, set aside on a plate. Add garlic to pan and cook until softened. Add tomato paste and stir in, letting cook until it starts to brown. Add harissa, chicken broth, chickpeas, and bring to a simmer.

Add back the chicken, skin side up, and surround in tomatoes, keeping them whole. Roast in the oven for 20-25 minutes, until cooked through.

Parmesan tuile:
1 3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese

Preheat the oven to 350ºF.
Line a baking sheet with parchment or waxed paper. For each tuile, spread 3 tablespoons of the grated cheese on the paper to form a 3-inch round. Spread around into a wing shape. Bake until golden brown, about 12 minutes.
Cool for 1 minute. Using a metal spatula. Transfer the tuiles to another piece of parchment or waxed paper and cool completely.

Night Watch Blueberry Brulee

Blueberry creme brulee:
2 cups heavy cream
4 large egg yolks
1 cup sugar
1/3 cup blueberry preserves
1 cup blueberries

Preheat oven to 300 degrees F.
In a heavy-bottomed medium nonreactive saucepan, heat cream over medium-low heat for 15 minutes, stirring to ensure it does not burn; do not let boil.
Add 1/4 cup heavy cream to beaten eggs. Mix together. Slowly add hot cream to mixture and add 1/2 cup sugar. Mix thoroughly.
Layer blueberry preserves on bottom of 4 separate 6oz ramekins then gently pour creme brulee mix over the preserves. Top each one with blueberries to cover the whole upper surface. Put ramekins in a glass baking dish and fill dish with water. You can use dish towels to add some stability so they don’t slip around. Make sure not to get any water in the ramekins, as this will ruin the custard. Bake in the oven for 40 minutes, or until the center is set. Sprinkle the remaining 1/2 cup sugar in a thin, even layer over the baked custard filling. To caramelize the sugar, light a propane torch and hold it so the flame just touches the surface. Start at the center and spiral out toward the edges of the ramekin. If the sugar begins to burn, pull the torch away and blow GENTLY on the sugar to extinguish the flame.

Earl grey whipped cream:
1 cup heavy cream
2 Earl Grey tea bags, or preferred tea flavor
2tbs granulated sugar

In a small saucepan over medium heat, combine the heavy cream and the tea bags.
Continually stir the mixture, gently pressing the tea bags into the cream to fully extract their flavor, and bring the cream to a simmer.
Once the cream begins to simmer, turn off the heat, and allow the tea bags to steep in the cream for at least one hour. If you prefer a stronger tea flavor, press the tea bags gently back into the cream every so often.
Once the steeping time has passed, remove the tea bags from the cream, gently pressing out any excess liquid, and transfer the cream to a bowl. Cover and set in the fridge until well chilled, about 2 hours.
Using a stand mixer fitted with a whisk attachment, pour the cream into the metal mixing bowl, and begin to whip the cream on low speed.
Sprinkle in the sugar, and bring the speed of the stand mixer to high, whipping the cream until stiff peaks begin to form.

Zeta Shift Spoopy Drank

2 oz Hpnotiq Harmonie
1 oz Lemon infused Vodka
Lemon peel
Tonic water
Glass: Cocktail Glass

Fill cocktail shaker with ice and add Hpnotiq Harmonie and lemon vodka and shake together. Strain into chilled cocktail glass, top with tonic water and lemon peel garnish. Preferably served in a room with nothing but black lights for maximum spoop.

Runner-up submission, by Betsy:

Horizon Caramel Candy

Ingredients:
– white sugar (amount depends on how much candy desired, 100% scalable!)
– brown sugar
– blue sparkle sugar
– green sprinkles

Hardware:
– heavy bottomed saucepan
– silicone spatula
– cookie sheet covered in parchment paper

1) In your heavy bottomed sauce pan, place the white sugar in an even layer. Set over low heat and don’t touch it until you see it begin to melt. Don’t touch!

2) As it starts to melt, start gently swirling the pan to catch all the sugar crystals. Try to even out the color if some parts are heating and browning faster than others.

3) Realize you weren’t paying enough attention and the caramel burned. Soak the pan in hot water to dissolve the sugar out.

4) Repeat steps 1 and 2, but not 3.

5) As everything becomes melted, continue to swirl over medium heat until the caramel has darkened to your desired color. A warm amber is my preference.

6) Pour out onto your parchment lined cookie sheet. You may now use the spatula to scrape out the caramel. You can do many small circles or one big circle. You can even try a mold!

6b) Try a mold and forget to properly lubricate it, thus having to dissolve the sugar off the mold with hot water.

7) Place your green tree sprinkles, sprinkle your brown sugar desert and blue sparkle sugar sky into the still warm and liquid caramel, but very carefully! Gently pat the sugars into the caramel.

8) Let cool and harden. When cool enough to handle, peel off the parchment.

If desired, serve with a Zeta Shift.

Zeta Shift:

– 1 part grenadine
– 1 part blue curacao

Light it on fire for maximum bad decisions.

Runner-up submission, by Conrad:

Chicken a la Bus

The following recipe was originally popular among bus drivers on the long haul from Tuscon to Vegas. These brave souls required sustenance in the barren high desert, and this meal was quick enough to prepare at a bus stop without risking the bus overheating. We present it as is tradition with minimal modifications for the modern kitchen (e.g. replacing the foraged insects with onions and the ‘faux-pine’ with parsley). Later generations of bus drivers would compliment this dish with fresh vegetables and rice or pasta to balance the nutrition; here we present the earliest form and leave the choice of side dishes to the home chef. We especially eschew the current trend of replacing the chicken breast with duck, as the duck was sacred in this culture. However, research indicates this dish may also have included pork cutlet, what they called ‘sweetened pig’. The drivers would pair it with a glass of tepid water, but had it been available, vodka would likely have been at least as popular. For those not ready to fully immerse themselves in the experience, a trance state they called ‘Zeta’, a pinot grigio is also an appropriate pairing.

Ingredients

1 (4-6 oz) skinless chicken breast
1 Tbsp butter
1/2 cup onion, diced
1 tsp flour
1/2 cup chicken stock
parsley (1 Tbsp dried or 1/4 cup fresh-preferred)
black pepper
kosher salt

Prep time: 5 minutes
Cook time: 15 minutes
Total time: 20 minutes

Butterfly the chicken breast and optionally pound with a meat mallet. (This was historically done by running over the breast with the bus.) Optional: Simmer the breast for approx. 5 minutes in water and then chill up to eight hours to a driving shift in advance. Lightly salt chicken breast on both sides. Melt butter over medium-high heat in a skillet and add chicken breast for 2-3 minutes or until lightly browned on one side. Flip to the left (or the chicken will fall out of the pan, crashing to the floor), and continue cooking until the breast is fully cooked and lightly browned on the other side, about 1-2 minutes. Remove chicken and set aside. Reduce heat to low and add chopped onions and a pinch of salt. Sweat until as translucent ‘as an Arizona dawn that never seems to come’ (the etymology of this phrase is still unknown), approx. 2 minutes. Sprinkle flour in and stir continuously for 30 seconds. Stir in stock, bringing to a simmer. If using dried parsley, add 1 Tbsp now. Reduce until sauce coats the back of a spoon. (Take your time with this step, or as the ancient records say, ‘don’t exceed 45 mph’.) Add salt and pepper to taste (the earliest recipes describe this euphemistically as ‘crying forever’).

Plating: We suggest using plates with a light brown/turquoise theme to recreate the empty expanses that created this dish, although paper plates would be more authentic. Set chicken breast on plate (optionally on top of rice/pasta) and spoon sauce on top. If using fresh parsley, roughly chop it and sprinkle on top. Ancient writings suggest that this dish was ritualistically consumed by ‘performing a challenge’, perhaps as a rite of adulthood. Theses ‘challenges’ are too horrific by modern standards to be described here, and are omitted to avoid spoiling the appetite. Enjoy, as these poor bus drivers might say, ìFor the Children!î

Servings: 1 (because a driver is always alone with their bus), but easily scales
Lickability: 8.5/10 Turners