We have a winner!
The idea was for Morgan to pitch an idea to a show like Dragon’s Den and this is what we’re going with:
In these financially stretched times, businesses across America and the western world are searching for innovative methods of improving employee performance and productivity. At Marquis Enterprises we believe firmly that we have found the new, fun way to motivate your staff.
Building on the wildly successful 50 Shades of Grey novels, we have developed a comprehensive and detailed program of S & M team building exercises. A varied range of one, two and three day courses will stretch your workforce in ways they have never been stretched before, and ensure that they can rely on their colleagues through intimate knowledge of their strengths and weaknesses.
A varied schedule of activities and games will lead your employees through to new levels of confidence and self esteem, secure in the knowledge that their workmates understand them – inside and out. All equipment is included in the cost of the course, and complete discretion is guaranteed, as is full hygiene certification.
“A happy team is a team with a safe word”
(At this point you could invite the Dragons to get involved in a sample round of Find The Egg)
We also have nine more runners up after this break:
I’m offering you the once in a lifetime opportunity to get in on the
ground floor of the next hot sports drink.
I give you: “Dehydrated Water.”
It’s a plastic bottle lined with energy minerals and proteins to give you “Power Hydration” when you have a “Power Thirst”.
Just add water.
Desert Bus is a charity that raises money for children by driving a simulated journey between Las Vegas and Tuscon. This charity has raised more than a million dollars, but we feel that it is physical distance that keeps those totals down.
Our plan is to create an actual bus line that runs from the city border of Las Vegas to the city border of Tuscon on a continuous route. People love Desert Bus and with The Desert Bus Experience they will be able to see the sights of the actual journey with their own eyes!A diverse selection of different seat classes will allow those with limited means to afford the trip and those with more disposable income to enjoy additional amenities, like water or bathroom breaks.Wiggins Class – An aisle seat. On the floor.Creepy Class – Sitting right behind Wiggins class.LRR Class – A standard seatBear Class – An entire Row all to your hairy self.Morgan Class – On the Driver’s Lap (Wiggins, Coach, of the children’s charity Desert BusRoscoe Class – You are the Driver.Tickets are, of course, round trip, with each loop adding a an additional charge with a 7% rider surcharge.
Dragon, sharks, various other scary predators both real and mythical, thank you for your time. I’ll be brief. We’re all businessman here. Men of action, decision makers, doers. We need to have the immediate attention of every eyeball when we walk into the room. We need to project authority and have our command accepted at an instant. However, we’re busy. Almost eternally busy. I can’t even imagine the sheer amount of effort it must have took to find the time to speak with me today. It takes time to have the look and form to keep an entire room following your every word… time you don’t have. That’s where I come in. I’m going to say a word now and I want you to just let it linger for a second.
Now, I can see some of you shifting about in your seats from that, but please… think about it this way. If I had filled the room with henchmen, would you have dared looked uncomfortable? Of course not! You wouldn’t have even thought to be anything but enthralled! I could have walked in there with a bathrobe and sweatpants, scraggly beard and a mullet and it wouldn’t have mattered. Henchmen would have provided instant respect. Whether for contractual negotiations, performance reviews or even the office Christmas party, henchmen mean “I am in control even if this mustard stained suit might say otherwise”.
“But wait”, I hear you say, “In this, where can one find quality henching labor at affordable prices? Surely it would be less effective for my henchman to telecommute from India” And of course you would be correct. However, due to the down economy and overflowing American prison, we stand on the cusp of capitalizing a new, untapped resource. Prison labor is cheap, plentiful, hardworking and comes with years of proven, on the job experience. With costs at dollars day and a minimal kickback to a few corrupt wardens, it would be a “crime” to let this policy failure-tunity pass you by!
So rather than wasting all your precious time and money on power-ties, tailored vests and fancy cars, let me provide you with authority on command with a quick phone call and fifty dollars a day. I won’t be undersold and you won’t be disrespected in the board room again! Just be sure not to look any of your new henchmen in the eye… it sets them off. And if the FBI calls, you don’t know me.
My business proposal would be for Morgan and his brother Josh to attempt to start up a seemingly legitimate range of ‘Real Men’ food products, but of course something isn’t as it seems, the foodstuffs would contain the worlds hottest chili pepper which I believe is currently the Trinidad Scorpion Moruga Blend. Now assuming the show would prescreen the foods before the actual show a non chili containing meal could be used, and then switched out during the real show. This then leads to the obvious ending of this proposal; one or hopefully all of the dragons will try the meal. Trolling successful.
Expanding your successful beverage enterprise to include other alternatives such as: juices, water, and other non-alcoholic beverages.I mean, more beverages to sell to a wider selection of people means more profits right?Morgan wants fun? I can’t help with fun, but if he’s thristy, he can enjoy a nice, ice-cold, refreshing, Jose Cuervo Spring Water.Or what about a Miller Light Apple Juice? Fifty percent less sugar! Juice not your thing? Jack Daniel’s Iced Tea!Imagine college students getting stoked for a party, and a guy shows up with a bottle of Absolut! …Mineral Water.
My idea for dragons den would be an umbrella that when rain hits certain parts of it, it emits a different sound creating some sort of musical beat, with like whistles placed around that are tuned to different pitches that create a sort of soothing melody. The down side? Imagine what it would sound like in an EXTREMELY heavy wind and rain storm
A charity bus system with free rides from Tuscon, Arizona to Las Vegas, Nevada and back again called The Desert Bus Experience. Now how would you monetise this? Simple. Each bus seat has a copy of Desert Bus built into the seat that each occupant must play.If a player can complete an entire run of Desert Bus, then their ride is free. However if a player crashes, then they must cover the fare from the point that they have crashed til the Vegas stop.There are ways that people can co-operate though. If a group decides to co-operate, then they can arrange shifts between them for bathroom and food breaks at rest stops. This will encourage more group travel and more discussions within the group and thus will increase friendships and communities within the bus that will hopefully continue to grow outside of the bus itself. The shift schedule must be handed to the driver at the start of the route or bus stop they get on at and they must stick to it, if they do not it counts as a crash for the group and the following rule takes effect.To continue to monetise the system with effect to groups, if the group crashes, then each person must cover the total fare of the group (Example, if a group of 4 people enter the bus as a group and crash at a point that is $20 away from the end of the route, each person must cover $80)To further increase revenue, and build communities between frequent riders, there will be no food allowed on the bus and no built in toilets. However to lower the risk of arguements between people congregating together in the desert heat, the bus will be air-conditioned and drinks will be allowed on the bus (This will also increase revenue as it runs the increased risk of needing a toilet break and crashing the bus).For added difficulty, a TV will be installed within the bus playing random assorted YouTube clips, don’t break challenges and songs. Half of the proceeds would be given to Child’s Play and he other half will be used to maintain the costs of running the bus. Since this would be a daily journey (One day there, the other back), there would need to be a decent number of drivers and a fairly reliable bus (For the added experience, the bus should always veer to the right slightly o make sure that the driver’s concentration doesn’t break during the journey).I believe this pitch shall bring in at least 5 Desert Bucks per week if this system is campaigned effectively enough. Gentlemen and ladies, I await your decision.
What need is there for this product? you might ask. And you will be wise to ask, but every day people get hurt in different ways, getting hit by cars, falling down buildings and getting scratched or bitten by animals. Why not let this happen to Morgan instead? Morgan will be entertained, you will be in less pain. EVERYBODY WINS!Who are the customers you might ask? Well. Everyone who wants a bit more fun and excitement in their life, but not suffer the consequences. Morgan doesn’t care about the consequenses, just bring on the fun!Who is the competition? There is no competition. The professionel stuntmen doesn’t want to work real life situations and people who are accident prone havn’t yet considered trying to earn money on this. This means the market is completely open and “Morgan wants fun” has a great chance to be a succes.What unique elements do Morgan bring to this? Ask Bill’s mom. Just.. ask Bill’s mom.
A television show which features Bills mom and dale, they deal with everyday problems in a reality tv set as most people watch that crap nowadays ($.$) then at the end of each episode Dale reads out a story in his epic voice that Bill’s mom has wrote down!